Journal Through Recovery Entry 11: Disclosure Day 3

CASTIMONIA

I am watching videos while my wife meets with our therapist on the morning of day 3 of our disclosure. This is an interesting video, related to the science of addiction, that addiction is actually a disease, and the impact on the brain.  The short and long term impacts are staggering and are illustrative of the depths of my addiction and the difficulty to rewire my brain and break out of this place of depression and damage to myself, my spouse and my family.  I keep saying over and over with each new revelation that I didn’t know, I didn’t know, I didn’t know. I am very aware and concerned about not taking responsibility.  I do take responsibility for my behavior.  There is so much here that I didn’t know, or more accurately, didn’t see.

We are discussing my assessment results. I took several assessments when I scheduled the intensive…

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