Confession

CASTIMONIA

Confession – Keith B – NotUnknown.com

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” – 1 John 1:9

I confessed my sins in secret. I didn’t spend a lot of time on it and didn’t see the importance. 1 John states the results of confession – forgiveness and purification from unrighteousness. But what if we don’t confess our sins? What happens then?

My life was an example of unconfessed sin and incorporated shame. My exposure to pornography and an unwanted sexual experience at an early age warped my view of my value to God and my ability to confess sin. I didn’t believe that confession to God or to others was possible. I thought my sin was more, different, and unforgivable. Sin and temptation meant judgment, not confession or grace.

Unconfessed sin rotted me from the…

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The Myth of the Nagging Wife — It’s Invisible Burns That Actually End Marriages

Must Be This Tall To Ride

Burn victim with medical bandages Sometimes we’ll find it’s the husbands, or men, in relationships whose invisible wounds aren’t properly cared for. Just not most of the time. (Image/RawStory) We sometimes hear husbands complain about their stupid, bitchy, nagging wives.

Some of them probably are married to petty, unkind women who’ve been plotting all along to make their husbands’ lives miserable. Statistical probability and whatnot.

But that’s NOT who most women are.

Most women said yes to a man’s voluntarily offered marriage proposal.

This isn’t arranged marriage in medieval times. This is one adult voluntarily asking another adult to give up being single together to form a partnership and live together faithfully for the rest of their lives, share property and finances, and maybe have children together.

Maybe some people don’t mentally grasp the parameters of a typical marriage agreement, but I feel confident in speculating that most do. Most people know what they’re signing…

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Hugh Hefner Dead At 91 & Playboy

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Obviously, there is sadness in the Playboy world.

But we have to put things into perspective.

It’s very easy to condemn people but we also must understand that the Lord Jesus said that they are condemned already.

Jesus said in John 3:18-21….“He who believes in Him is not condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. For everyone practicing evil hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed. But he who does the truth comes to the light, that his deeds may be clearly seen, that they have been done in God.”

You can’t condemn someone that is already…

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Divorce or Stay? Using Direct vs. Circumstantial Evidence to Decide

Must Be This Tall To Ride

Evidence (Image/Behance)

There’s direct evidence that I was a crap husband and that my ex-wife made the right choice in ending our marriage.

I left her alone and crying in the hospital the night our son was born. Fact.

When given the choice, I often chose myself and my preferences over her and her preferences. Fact.

During disagreements between us in which I felt confident in my beliefs, I treated her as if she was wrong, and as if her ideas or beliefs were stupid. Fact.

Because my ex-wife is female—and in my life experience, I’d seen mostly women handling the lion’s share of household tasks and childcare like laundry, dusting, vacuuming, cleaning bathrooms, decorating, and basically everything related to caring for babies and small children—my general behavior and state-of-being in our marriage was one of passively leaving most life and household management tasks and decisions to her.

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8 Ways Good People Invalidate Their Partners and Ruin Relationships

Must Be This Tall To Ride

(Image/Pinterest) That’s an important word—“invalidate.” But I haven’t always thought so.

My wife would sometimes ruin an otherwise perfectly good night at home or dinner conversation by accusing me of “invalidating her feelings,” to which I’d usually roll my eyes at my silly, overly sensitive wife and her cute littlefeelings.

Feelings aren’t facts, right? So facts matter and feelings don’t—a convenient excuse to fall back on any time the topic was about something impacting her emotionally but not affecting me.

“It’s always about what Matt wants,” she’d say. I’d get angry (and all of the suddenfeelingsmattered!) and remind her that she’s the one who started it by freaking out because I apparently didn’t do or say what she wanted me to.I’m not a mind-reader, freak-o!

Even today, I’m guilty of thinking back on my marriage as a relationship with fights about things that didn’t matter…

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The Death of Manhood

Must Be This Tall To Ride

The Suicide by Edouard Manet “The Suicide” by Edouard Manet (Image/Public domain)

I made fun of my gay friend in high school for the same reason I was afraid to tell my father about this blog.

It’s also the same reason I was a shitty husband, and the same reason millions of men—even ones who are pretty good guys—are shitty husbands.

Somewhere down deep, in places we don’t like to talk about, most men are afraid of losing their identity as men. They’re afraid of being rejected by their male peers. They’re afraid of not being respected or sexually desired by women. They’re afraid of disappointing their fathers, their coaches, their male mentors.

Men are so afraid of these things that we don’t seek help when we need it in matters big and small, for fear of projecting a lack of “manliness.” We sometimes won’t even admit there’s a problem.

I can handle it…

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